I did not know you on the day of your birth in 1997. We first met in November of 2003. You were already six years old but only had seen 23,000 miles of Arizona roads. You mostly sat lonely in the garage, someone's "vacation home" car, burning up in that hot weather. I was so excited to call you mine. And now you are fourteen years old. FOURTEEN! And I've put miles on you, oh yes I have - 99,000 now. Everyone who meets you is surprised and pays you that compliment "wow she looks great for her age". Yikes. And oh, I have paid to keep all your parts in good working order. But you're mine, all mine; no car payment, no hassle. And so, for your good behavior and superior good looks, today I'm giving you a $2,000 present (surprise - even to me). You're getting your brakes flushed, new power steering lines & flush, an entire new lock cylinder and actuator (because you suddenly decided to be snotty and not let me open MY DOOR anymore), a new air filter and some other things the doctor told me you needed (I just nodded and nodded to make him stop talking). I think that's enough for now, don't you? I decided to be generous with you today because you just look like you've deserve it. But you better be grateful because that's it - no more until your birthday in 2013.